Christmas cards have been ordered. Sparkling lights brighten the outside of our home and tubs of decorations fill the inside just waiting for a team of girls to go to work. The tree is up and Christmas music adds festivity. It's Thanksgiving break and we're so thankful for the week off-- including plenty of rest and time with extended family. My oldest daughter and her friends fill our house with delicious baked treats as they try out new recipes. The scene is picture perfect in many ways and I'm overwhelmed with gratitude for all of the rich blessings around us. So..... why do I feel so bah humbug as we welcome another holiday season? Even the annual tradition of watching "Elf" felt odd to me this year. It's not the typical to-do list, the shopping requests or the commercialization of Christmas that gets to me. I think it's the passing of time and the increased speed of each year that gives me pause. I keep thinking, "Didn't we JUST welcome the New Year?!" "2014-- where did it go?" "It seems we just celebrated Thanksgiving in Katy, Texas." These thoughts go on and on as I feel like it should be spring or early summer, NOT quickly approaching winter already! And, whatever happened to fall in Texas?! It's my favorite season and it lasted close to 10 days with the late departure of unwelcome heat and the early arrival of freezing weather. Of course the year was a full one-- we savored the busy days! We have multiple photo albums of memories reminding us of the Lord's goodness to us. I have no regrets. Still, I'm amazed by how quickly the weeks passed in 2014. It's as if the planets raced around the sun in their orbit making the seasons shorter somehow.
Maybe, this perspective is a normal mindset for those entering the mid-forties.... a midlife shift of sorts? Is this what they call a mid-life crisis? In the recent weeks, our church family welcomed two sweet baby girls and a baby boy to this world with great joy. At the same time, we celebrated the home-going of a dear sister-in-Christ as she entered the glories of heaven. Both beginning and end of life give us pause and cause us to offer much praise and thanksgiving to God. While these precious babies know none of the sufferings of life in a fallen world as they begin their days on earth, our amazing friend, who endured suffering through the various seasons of life, knows only peace in presence of her Savior as she also knows none of the sadness of this world anymore. Unlike these dear souls, I am in the middle of life on earth and all too aware of the tragic and horrific circumstances filling the news of our days. Thankfully, I am acquainted with the One who numbers our days and who rules over the the seasons with unending faithfulness. I rest in His care as He holds my days with steadfast love.
"The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want ......... Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life and I shall dwell in the house of the LORD forever." from Psalm 23
Monday, November 24, 2014
Sunday, November 2, 2014
Old Blog, New Name
For some time now, the name of my blog has bothered me---"Teacher's Notes". Originally, I started writing to keep notes while teaching in Africa, kind of a travel blog for family and friends back home. I never intended to continue writing after the summer of 2012. However, in God's providence, the "notes" continued following Dad's tragic accident and untimely death. Then, in the midst of a new season of parenting multiple teenagers, the words seemed to flow even more. Still, I'm not trying to TEACH anything to those who stumble across this blog, so the name seems unfitting. Sure, I'm a teacher, but I have no intention of sharing information from my classroom. My teaching profession is just one of the many aspects of life.
I've considered some questions to come up with a more appropriate name: Why do I write and what is the purpose? Is it just an online diary of sorts? As one who is prone to wander from the Lord in my thoughts, words and deeds, just as a sheep wanders from the fold, I hope my writing reflects a journey of stumbling faith in the midst of this broken world and mostly a faithful Shepherd who continually protects, guides and sustains me. I hope the grace and mercy of the Lord shines through my weakness and that fellow stumblers will be encouraged to seek Christ as well. In those moments when I feel the most vulnerable, such as middle of the night anxiousness, (most especially at my father's bedside during his final hours) "the Lord is my shepherd" plays over and over and over in my mind and heart. No matter the role-- teacher, mother, wife or friend--- I am no more than a needy sinner (a sheep) in need of the steadfast love and unending faithfulness of the Lord Jesus. His forgiving mercy and abundant goodness should be the theme of my writing. So much of life is confidential and not appropriate to share in a blog, but my journey with the Lord, in the midst of it all, is an open book and one that I will continue to record if the Lord wills.
"Know that the LORD, he is God! It is he who made us, and we are his; we are his people and the sheep of his pasture. Enter his gates with thanksgiving, and his courts with praise! Give thanks to him; bless his name! For the LORD is good; his steadfast love endures forever; and his faithfulness to all generations." Psalm 100: 3-5
" Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through the fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior." Isaiah 43
I've considered some questions to come up with a more appropriate name: Why do I write and what is the purpose? Is it just an online diary of sorts? As one who is prone to wander from the Lord in my thoughts, words and deeds, just as a sheep wanders from the fold, I hope my writing reflects a journey of stumbling faith in the midst of this broken world and mostly a faithful Shepherd who continually protects, guides and sustains me. I hope the grace and mercy of the Lord shines through my weakness and that fellow stumblers will be encouraged to seek Christ as well. In those moments when I feel the most vulnerable, such as middle of the night anxiousness, (most especially at my father's bedside during his final hours) "the Lord is my shepherd" plays over and over and over in my mind and heart. No matter the role-- teacher, mother, wife or friend--- I am no more than a needy sinner (a sheep) in need of the steadfast love and unending faithfulness of the Lord Jesus. His forgiving mercy and abundant goodness should be the theme of my writing. So much of life is confidential and not appropriate to share in a blog, but my journey with the Lord, in the midst of it all, is an open book and one that I will continue to record if the Lord wills.
"Know that the LORD, he is God! It is he who made us, and we are his; we are his people and the sheep of his pasture. Enter his gates with thanksgiving, and his courts with praise! Give thanks to him; bless his name! For the LORD is good; his steadfast love endures forever; and his faithfulness to all generations." Psalm 100: 3-5
" Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through the fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior." Isaiah 43
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