This is the Time to Remember

This week marks the arrival of spring and I must say there is more of a spring in my step with consistent sunny skies and nice weather in the forecast!  On the first day of spring (March 20th), I drove home from school and felt on top of the world, full of energy and satisfied with a productive and meaningful day in the classroom.  Chicago's, "Hard Habit to Break" played on one of my favorite Satellite radio stations and made me a bit wistful as I considered the teenage years, as if they were just yesterday.   Just a few minutes later, I pulled into our driveway as my daughter and some girlfriends pulled out in a caravan and my oldest stuck her body through the sunroof to wave hello and goodbye to me.  I was reminded that it was not just yesterday that I was in her shoes or when my favorite Chicago song filled my mind with romantic thoughts of teenage love.  30 years has passed since the release of that song, so let's face the reality--- I am getting OLD!

Later that evening, this same daughter filled out an application online to be a life guard this summer.  This was another jolt to my system as a second distant memory seemed just like yesterday.  How can a little girl, who recently fought with me about getting her face in the water, protect others in a busy neighborhood water park?!?  Believe it or not, I argued with her about this prospective job and even went to bed with things less than peaceful in our home.  The following morning, I woke with regret, considering how we have only 2 years left with our oldest at home.  TWO YEARS?!  Everyone knows that a couple years can pass in the blink of an eye.  Even the first years of life-- newborn days to the terrible twos are fleeting, while also seemingly endless and quite challenging.  I drove to work having been reminded of the teenage years slipping away from us and I considered--- THIS is the time to remember and to savor with our girls.  Even baby Kelly will move out in just 6 years and we will enter a completely different season as parents.  As I left for work, surprisingly and appropriately, Billy Joel's song, "This is the Time" played on the radio.  The lyrics were so fitting for the moment and for the thoughts running through my head.  The words that struck me were:  This is the time to remember--- cause it will not last forever.  These are the days to hold on to---- cause we won't although we'll want to.  This is the time, but time is gonna change.  Although I want to treasure these limited days with our girls at home, my days are often filled with regrets as a mother. 

This week has been filled with times to remember as our second daughter has been on a family movie marathon.  Her baby and toddler videos have been on continuous loop.  She watched our wedding video, the entire ceremony and reception, twice in the recent days.  Video clips as newlyweds and new parents have reminded us that times certainly change and seasons of life go by all too fast.  Just this week, I've watched clips of  Caroline just out of the womb, unable to hold her head up, taking first bites of solid food, getting a clean diaper, taking her first steps, learning to go potty, learning to swim and peddling a bike for the first time.  It is surreal to think of all the significant times to remember in nearly 20 years of marriage.  Now that we've entered the final years of parenting in the home, I'm all too aware that I have not been the model mother for an episode of Leave it to Beaver and that is not likely to change in the remaining years.  So often the times I remember are those when I'm stumbling in sin and where I'm eternally grateful for the Lord Jesus and his sanctifying work in my life.  If I could go back and relive the video clips of our life, I would certainly be more grateful and gracious in each of the little moments of our days.  Even this week, that is all too real to me, but  thankfully, each morning (including the second day of spring) I'm increasingly aware that His mercies are new every morning. 

Going Home

Spring Break 2014 is here!  The car is overflowing with duffles, dog cages and ski gear.  We're leaving the Texas forecast in the 70's and heading for temperatures ranging from the teens to the 30's.  Happy Spring, folks!  While pulling out the ski gear (unused for a couple years and mostly outgrown) and also scheduling private lessons for the girls and reserving equipment, I did a short trip down memory lane.  The Rocky Mountains, Crested Butte, ski slopes and ski gear make me think of Dad.  My brother tells a story of how I learned to ski around age 4.  He claims that Dad "spanked me down Simba"-- a ski slope in Vail, Colorado.  While this is only partially true, it does capture decades of memories from Spring Break in Colorado.  Wake up, suit up, ski hard and fast--- no need for careful turns--- just tuck and race to the bottom.   I haven't been skiing since Dad died; he was my best partner on the slopes, well, except for my brother.  In his later years, we would ski a run, stop at a warming hut for a drink, then ski another run to the next warming hut.  Due to the fast speeds previously mentioned, this worked out to be about 3 minutes on the slopes for every hour spent with hot chocolate or a warm "mixed drink"---skis off by the fire.  All these thoughts going through my mind leave me with a feeling that we're going home to Colorado, as it is so connected with Dad.  I have no idea if I will even ski this year, but I'm certain that Dad's memory will be powerfully felt.  I'm thankful to have a lifetime of memories with him in the Rocky Mountains where his passionate and adventurous ways were on full display.