Reluctantly Letting Go

Today was the kick-off to our ABC Countdown to summer--It was "Art day".  Yippee!?!?   With only 25 days till summer, I'm struck with the fact that it's time to let our kindergarten friends go on to first grade and I'm once again reluctant to do so.  As teachers, every year we pour so much of ourselves into our sweet friends and then we send them off to the next grade, as if passing a baton.  We trust that another teacher will pick up where we left off and that he or she will shower our precious students with loving care.  We are only given a short window of opportunity in the lives of our students.  Of course, the thought of summer days excites us, but the annual tradition of letting go tugs at our hearts. 

Tomorrow morning my oldest will take her drivers test to become officially licensed.  We are confident about her ability, after much practice, but it really gets to me that she will be her driving herself to school right after the test.  I don't know how other parents experienced this first step of freedom for their teenage children, but once again, I'm hesitant to let go.  How can my baby girl drive a machine of metal at 40+++  miles an hour with no carseat and no adult supervision?!

As a kindergarten teacher, I continually encourage my students to do new things on their own.  At the beginning of the year, there are NO expectations..... Parents help with all sorts of things: unpacking/carrying backpacks, putting on/zipping up jackets, tying shoes and opening/closing lunch items.  By the end of the year, some independence is expected.  As a parent, I relate with the challenge of letting our little ones become more independent and how easy it is to do everything for them.  Even this evening, one of my daughters tried to run the vacuum cleaner under the kitchen table and she was not familiar with how to use the appliance.  Obviously, I've been doing it or paying someone to do it for too long.  This was a wake-up call. 

As we anticipate summer days, our mailbox is filled with graduation announcements.  Even today, we received mail from two dear families who shared this important event in the lives of their sons.  In our home we place graduation photos alongside birth announcements.  If you were to visit, you would know that we prominently display significant life announcements (weddings, births, graduations) on the tile wall behind our kitchen phone.   This evening it hit me that the handsome 18 year old son of my dear friend (in one announcement) is just like the newborn baby in the birth announcement right beside.  For those of us entering the "letting go" season of life, it was just yesterday that we welcomed our newborn babies to this world and when we found it easier to tie the shoes ourselves than to teach our kindergarten children how to tie shoes.  As a mother who is forced to encourage independence in my quickly growing daughters, I need to pray for wisdom from the Lord and abiding trust in him, knowing that he cares for them abundantly more than I ever could and that he watches over their coming and going, even in quickly moving vehicles. 

Ordinary Life

This week I've been especially grateful and more aware of the blessing of a great life!  I don't write this in a boastful-bring-others-down kind of way; I ride the roller coaster of emotions with ups and downs just as much as the next girl.  Now that I'm creeping uncomfortably close to fifty years of living, I'm finding the low moments to be particularly low and more regular while the highs are not so high, yet sweeter in experience.  There were many moments of pause this week, in the car, the school hallways, the classroom and in our home, where I just took it all in and gave thanks to the Lord for his goodness in the mundane aspects of life.

Yesterday, after arriving home from work, Kyle and I shared our weekly Friday afternoon routine- including beverages on the patio.  However, this week was different.  The girls did not join us and we didn't speak much.  The birds were singing.  The temperature was ideal and the skies were bright blue.  The only words we exchanged were weather related... a perfect old couple image.  This was yet another one of those moments where I thought: "It doesn't get any better than this!" As usual, my body was exhausted from a busy week in kindergarten, with plenty of challenging circumstances throughout the week, yet, in the quiet of our backyard, my thoughts were: "This moment is pinch-me-perfect," a consistent thought throughout the week.

Our evening continued with an unusual treat; all five of us went out for dinner and a little shopping.  Rarely do we get all three girls on a weekend night due to babysitting schedules and other activities.  I tend to savor these times more and more in the recent years.  Before dinner, one of our girls asked why we don't do things like other families.  She commented that her friends get to do so many things and that our family is so ordinary.  Initially, I responded with comments including: living within your means, avoiding debt, the importance of savings.  Then, as everyone, including Kyle, tuned me out, I mentioned that our lives are not just ordinary, but they are extraordinary.  It's in the small, everyday slices of life where I'm tasting the sweetest joy and where peace reigns in my soul.  Mountain top experiences and/or beach vacations bring enjoyment and refreshment to be sure, but deep gratitude comes, most often, in moments of mundane life when God's abundant goodness is gloriously extraordinary!