After a typically full day in the classroom, while driving home from school, one of my all time favorite songs played on the radio. Garth Brooks song, "The Dance", kicked me out of a tired post-work daze and took me back to my wedding day almost 19 years ago. Ouch!!! Dad and I danced to this song during our wedding reception. For nearly a year, music has been the most painful trigger, but the recent months have not included the daily flood of sad memories while driving to and from school. This unexpected, and now rare, moment got me to thinking about life and how it is somewhat like a "dance".
During this season of raising teenagers and teaching kindergarten, my dance moves are definitely ungraceful and anything but lovely. Weekly, even daily, I feel out of shape and uncoordinated, as if stepping on everyones' toes. I go to bed with regret and a long list of "should haves" and I wake each morning with humble and dependent prayers to the Lord. After dancing through the baby-toddler- stay-at home-Mom years with ballroom technique precision (still not graceful), I'm confronted with the teen-working-mom-years and becoming acquainted with my clumsy and frequently stumbling posture.
Thankfully, by God's gracious provision and His faithfulness, I'm learning to dance more gracefully during this season of parenting and teaching. My childhood years included hours and hours of training in ballet classes and the girls and I have enjoyed season tickets to Texas Ballet Theater over the last decade, so I'm aware that the delicate and seemingly effortless choreography of the ballet comes with most rigorous (and even painful) training.
As the piano beautifully closes Garth Brook's song (my favorite part), the lyrics include, "I could have missed the pain, but I'd have to miss the dance." This rings true for me and reminds me of the glorious gifts from God surrounding me each day. It is ironic how the role of mother and teacher includes helping others to learn and grow, yet most days I'm the one growing, learning and being shaped the most. By His tender hand and by the power of His Spirit, may He produce the fruit of the spirit in my life so that I may "dance" in the midst of life and among others with ever growing grace and mercy.
